30 Signs Your Relationship Is So Comfortable You're In Danger of Breaking Up
We date so that we can form relationships. Except for those outliers who date for hook-ups or because they are masochists who really like stringing together lots of short affairs, a long-term relationship is the point of all of these efforts.
The discomfort you have on a first date is not something you want to perpetuate for the rest of your life. Humans seek comfort. Comfort is good. But when does too much comfort become a relationship-eroding thing?
- You go unshaven more and more--yet you're not growing a beard.
- You wear your white brief-style underwear. You know, the kind that your Mother dressed you in when you were 5 years old.
- You cry in front of her--not for big things like a loved one dying, but for minor things like a co-worker was nasty to you.
- You ask her to tend to your personal hygiene, like squeezing pimples or shaving your back hair.
- You let her--or ask her to--regularly shop for your clothes and toiletries.
- You begin wearing less and less makeup.
- You stop shaving underarms and legs.
- You ask him to pluck stray hairs or check your teeth for kale.
- You wear non awe-inspiring panties when you know he'll be looking at them.
- Your conversation with him is indistinguishable from that of your conversations with girlfriends.
- You don't close the bathroom door when doing non toilet-related activities.
- You don't close the bathroom door when peeing...or pooping.
- You sit at a restaurant or coffee shop, or bar, scrolling through your social media..while with your partner!
- You wear your ugly, comfortable lounge-around-the-house wear.
- You feel comfortable enough to fart in each others' vicinity.
- You wear matching clothing--intentional or not.
- You go on and on about your health.
- You regularly usurp your time with your partner to take calls from friends or family.
- You put down your partner...but hey, I'm just doing it jokingly!
- You let yourself be put down.
- You lounge around naked or near-naked...and not in a sexy way.
- You think your breath might be bad, but you don't really care.
- You don't care about your partner's opinion when you put on swimwear.
- You shower together while discussing the news
- You "Mother" or "Father" each other too much--pull up your pants, tie your shoes, did you pack your lunch?
- You answer each others' phones--or put your calls on speaker while your partner is in the room.
- You consistently expect the other person wash your clothes.
- You finish each other's sentences
- You have pet names for each other--names so dumb that you'd be embarrassed if anyone else heard them.
- You mention ex-partners when you're in a social situation with your current partner.
Remember: some mystery and distance is good. Becoming enmeshed is a sure fire way dampen the fires. Check out Esther Perel's TedTalk on the secret to desire in long term relationships.